I get my hopes up...

...and I watch them fall, everytime.
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I've just talked to him, and I've realised one thing: you've been lying to me this whole time. I don't know when it started, but I hope that it's going to stop now. You tried to come up with excuses. I was blind, until today. I talked to him and realised that what you said made absolutely no sense. At least, it never explained any of your actions at all. I only accepted it because I really thought you wouldn't betray my trust. Why did you have to do that? You said that you'd rather someone just criticise you straight to your face, but the way you deal with things, I don't think you'd be able to handle it. Even he thinks so too. I tricked myself into thinking that you weren't lying. Yes, I doubted, but I still believed it.

When I talked to him today, I realised, I was just in denial, like you are now. I'm sorry, but I'm really giving up on this. When I was talking to him, he said that this was tiring. I don't believe that he was of no help, but he was a total help to me. He made me feel much better, but even he admits that this is a lot that I'm going through right now. He said that this isn't easy for me, especially between someone whom I've known for the past 6 years, but isn't trusted as much by him, and someone whom I just met, but even he says is very loyal and trustworthy. I'm really tired, but I don't want to give up just as yet. I haven't done my best, but I'm hurting a lot on the inside. Why? Maybe it's just because you've been deceiving me for the past 3 years. Maybe it's just because I'm weak. Maybe it's just because I don't want to accept reality. I'm about to let go and say farewell, but I don't know if I should say see you later.