Reflection again...on my weird dream?!

Ok, I feel like blogging, but again, I have no idea what to blog about. Should I try Lester's way again? Haha. I'm talking to him right now. But the day has barely started, can I really just keep writing when nothing much has happened today?

Ok, firstly, it's already 10/10 in SG, so HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO VERNICE, MARC, AND MATTHEW!!! So, I woke up early JUST TO SMS VERNICE! Haha. And thankfully she got the sms. She replied too, and I wasn't expecting that.

Oh! This morning when mom was preparing to go to work, she was in the kitchen, and she turned on the tv! Was so loud! =( Then I woke up, but thankfully I was tired enough to go back to sleep! Haha. So yeah. That was my sleep for the night. Not very intresting actually, but I have nothing else to talk about. And this is all that's coming to my mind, so yeah, I guess I do have stuff to talk about.

Oh, and I had this super weird dream! I WAS BACK IN P6! =D And then our classrooms changed totally! Instead of individual desks, we had the group desk that looks like /===\ kind of thing. Haha. Ok, I don't know if you understand what I'm talking about but yeah. And then, I had to leave class for this field trip with the P2s?! Super weird. But then on the feild trip, I had to leave half way again! And this time was for a family party TO A GOOSE FARM?! HAHAHAHA yeah. Oh, and a pigeon farm too! Like wth. Then I had to join the P2s again to go back to school. On the way to the excursion bus, there was this lady who was washing bird shit off vehicles and the pavement?! Yeah. HAHAHA and then this group of cheerleaders walked pass her, and the started laughing at her. Then she used the hose she had in hand, and sprayed all of the cheerleaders. AND THERE WERE SO MANY CHEERLEADERS! Like, more than 50! Yeah, then when I got back to class, I was grouped up with PSY, SKL, Yamcake, and Turtle! HAHAH. Of all people, Turtle? I'm not even that close to her! I barely talk to her. And Mrs Tan was sorting out this whole wall that was full of pencil cases hanging on hooks! And you could write on them, and still erase it off. Like a whiteboard kind of thing. Haha. Then because Turtle had to take this test that was supposed to be a surprise, but she already knew of it before. Then Mrs Tan asked who told Toh Mie. HAHA of all names that came to my head, TOH MIE?! Lol. Haha. Then Turtle said Mee Yin, refering to Min Yee. BUT, we never had a Min Yee in our class, and she was refering to Min Yu! HAHA my dream was super messed up! And then, that's all I remember of my dream.

And, I promised to bring Verns to the zoo and night safari when I go back IN 2 YEARS! xD She still doesn't know I'm going back. So yeah. I'm gonna surprise her when I get back. I CAN'T WAIT!

14 days! But I haven't packed. How to pack?! I still need to use my clothes! =( I MISS SG! I miss Lesty. I miss Vern. I miss Ash. I miss Kiki. I miss Ry. I miss Val. I miss Gab. I miss Celly. I miss Vann. I miss the family! I miss Risen Christ and the sessions too! Oh well, time's coming soon!

Don't think, just write (type). A way of reflection I learnt from Lester.

Ok, I just feel like blogging. I don't know about what, or why. I just want to.

Sometimes, life's just that hard. But wth, just deal with it. Everything that comes your way gives you a new experience to remember each time. When you're wrong about something, you learn. When you're right about something, you learn. You never stop learning.

Something I really leart from CCD today is that no matter how young or old you are, you really never stop learning. Adults learn to be kids. Kids learn to be adults. We all learn to understand each other. If only life was that perfect. Everyone understanding each other. How much it saves my ears from things I really don't like to hear.

I just really hate it when friends tell me that they hate their siblings. Hate is such a strong word. How can you use that against your siblings?! That is something I can never understand. Yes, I admit, I use to fight with my siblings a lot when I was younger, but I have never said that I've hated them, and I never will. My siblings, in fact, my whole family, mean a lot to me. I think that I've said I hate my dad, but now that I've changed the way I look at things, I really doubt that I hate him. I think it's just the fact that a lot of the times that he chose to annoy me, it happened when I was annoyed with other stuff, but because him annoying me was always the most recent thing, I just vented about that, and nothing else.

Life is something we should never take for granted. There were multiple disasters last week. The tsunami in Samoa, the flooding in Phils, the earthquake in Indonesia. Sometimes, I really love nature, but then again, it can turn its back on us, and drastically change our views. Life is something that should be treasure, not taken for granted.

I heard that Kathryn and Kevin's cousin was lost after the flooding, but they found him. Thankfully. I started thinking about what I would be feeling if it was my cousin who was lost. Or worse, if I was the one who was lost. How would I have felt? Then I realised, this could actually happen to me at anytime. You'll never know for sure.

I've learnt a very important lesson at CCD today. No matter how young or old you are, you'll always be welcomed by everyone at Church. Somewhere that age really doesn't matter. We've got teachers with us from ages 14 to 60+. Right here is proof to everyone that adults and teens CAN work together. Those who really don't like their parents, you should really come for just ONE lesson, and I'm sure you'll be shocked at how all of us are just that close.

Even back home, look at the cathechism classes back home! The adults work together with the teens to teach all of us too! Is it really that hard to just TRY and understand our parents and siblings? I can testify that family is the most important thing in life. Family and love. I learnt today that it has been proven that if a baby doesn't have physical contant with human, it will die.

Today, we talked about the Sacraments. Ayrton and I had to do the outward sign skit, but I guess we didn't really get our message across to the kids. They don't really understand the difference between just telling someone that they're a great person, and giving them a pat on the shoulder while telling them they're a great person. I really think is makes a difference. I feel the difference even with my friends.

It's amazing how the only thing I've done today was just go for CCD class, yet, I've got so much to talk about. I wasn't even studying today. I really don't know how some topics came up. And I don't know if there are any spelling mistakes. I just wrote all this with my eyes close, with the spur of the moment. I don't even remember what I wrote. But I think I may do this more often.

A friend of mine who has led different camps in his life told me that he's done this a lot, and it's amazing how some people can't think of anything because they try to think too hard about what to write, but those who just relax and let words come to mind, they write a full page of thoughts in just a few minutes. I really like this. Sometimes, I have so much on my mind, but I don't feel like talking. I'm really not one who actually likes to talk much. I just like to type my feelings out. My friend's right. This can really help someone feel more at ease, and not like there's something bothering them.

Before I wrote this, I was trying so hard to recall what I've done that's bothering me now, but I could not think of a single thing! So I remembered this, and I just thought of giving it a try. I really do feel better now. I think it helps me.

Ok, I should be sleeping. It's already 12.20am. Nights!

Hmm...

Man, I miss talking to Les, Ash, Mandy, Ryan, Vern, and all of them! I miss sessions too.

AH! 18 days! And I still haven't packed! How to pack?! I have clothes that I still need to use! =( But, I CAN'T WAIT! =D I still need to study too. What to do?! My first time using my com after 3 days! Accomplishment! But then again, I haven't studied much yet. DIE!

Well, just wanna wish Val a happy belated 21st, and Tim a happy early 25th! BIRTHDAY MONTH IS HERE! So many birthdays!

I'm suddenly wondering, did I really make the right choice? I'm afraid I made this choice based on the wrong reason. Did I? I don't know. I can't turn back anyway, so I guess I'll just have to live with my decision.

I haven't gotten angry at anyone for the past week! Another accomplishment! =D Proud of myself.

Tired =(

*yawns* I can't believe it's not even 7pm! I'm already tired. You know what, I have 24 days left to BOTH STUDY AND PACK! Damn. I really need to step up and get going. I've barely started Sec 2 science. Chem is hard! But I like it. Haha. Oh. Trig ratios and equations are super hard to memorise! But again, I like it. HAHA. Maybe that's why I wanna go back. I love challenges! =D Ok, back to studying I go!

Hmm...

Ok I just spent the whole of today studying! I can't believe it! And OMG I totally didn't realise that I have 30 days left here! And I calculated, I have only 15 full 24-hr days left AT MOST! Sian la. I was just thinking about that, and that was good enough to get me studying from 11am to 1.30pm. Break for lunch. Studying from 2.30pm till 4pm. Ok, I think I'm going to watch 换换爱 and if I have time after, I'm gonna continue studying again. I finally have the motivation to study! =)

-.-

WTH! I finally see Ash online after 17 days, and guess what I happen to be doing? GOING TO BED! Damn it la. Haven't talked to him for so long lor. Haha. So I arranged to talk to him early in the morning. Must go sleep now! Haha. Bye!

Just a quick one...

Hey. Just wanted to acknowledge these people who've made my life intresting.

Thanks to God for all the challenges he puts before me.
Thanks to Joacs and Les for letting me rant.
Thanks to Les for entertaining me in the middle of the night.
Thanks to Vern for making me feel so loved.
Thanks to Amanda for all the memories we've shared, and the long-lasting friendship we have.
Thanks to Ash for always being there for me to talk about random stuff to.
Thanks to Kathryn for opening up my eyes to all the youth group stuff in church.
Thanks to CCD/PREP for giving me a place where I can put my knowledge of my faith to the test, and at the same time help others.
Thanks to CYF for opening my eyes to things I never knew I never knew about our faith.
Thanks to all my friends for accepting me for who I am.

The most important thanks I owe is to my family, including all my aunties and uncles, cousins, and grandparents.
Thanks to Mom and Dad for giving me such a luxurious life to live. It may not be the best of the best, but it's perfect for me.
Thanks to all three of my siblings for taking care of me.
Thanks to my cousins, aunties, and uncles for entertaining me at saturday dinners.
Thanks to my grandparents for taking care of me.

The specifics of the family.

Thanks to Mom for always cleaning up my messes, and for teaching me how to clean up after myself. Thanks for also helping me understand why Dad acts the way he does.

Thanks to Dad for always teaching me whenever I've had problems in my work. Thanks also for teaching me the syllabus in such a rushed time, even though you could very well be doing other stuff, becaue this doesn't benefit you in anyway. And thanks for giving our family the opportunity to try something new.

Thanks to Tim for cooking for me and the family. Even though I've lived almost half my life with out you, I still know how much you care for me. Thanks for explaining to me what Dad was trying to do for me when my short temper got the better of my. You'll always be the brother who fed me and taught me patience.

Thanks to Gab for always finding ways to entertain me. Especially with Bloo's 'suspicious' thing. HAHA. Thanks for taking care of me while I was home too. You'll always be the brother who could make me laugh at anytime.

Thanks to Val for inviting me to CYF when I first went back last year. Thanks also for being there for me this year when I really needed someone to cry on, even though it was 4am. Thanks for listening to me rant too, and for inviting me for supper with your friends too. You'll always be my one and only sister that I'll ever have who would take care of me.

Thanks to Vann for always showing her concern for me. Thanks also for helping plan Val's party.

Thanks to Aunty Linda for being so generous and inviting me on the trip to Beijing.

Thanks to Aunty Florence for sending the exam papers via express airmail. Thanks also for helping me get back into IJ.

I think I still owe thanks to others, but I really can't think of them now. Ok, I know my title says 'Just a quite one...' and it was meant to be, but I guess I had more to say than I thought.

Just thinking...

Ok, ever since visiting the Grotto of our Sorrowful Mother in Portland with the family, and talking about our faith with Tim and Mom, I've started to think a lot. Especially on the question 'If I wasn't born a cradle Catholic, would I have converted to this faith?' It's really bugging me, and when I saw what Aunty Linda wrote to Mom, I realised that it's very true that the majority of cradle Catholics, but not all, don't have a very strong faith, especially when compared to those who chose to learn about the faith on their own. Now I start to think, if other's who never grew up with this faith can have such strong belief, why can't I put in the effort to be like them? Follow as closely in the footsteps of Jesus as possible? It's amazing what influence others have on us, especially those who we thought were just like all of us.

For example, Aunty Linda, from what I remember, was never really that into our faith, even though she goes to church with the family every week. But I guess something in her just gave her that jolt of intrest in the faith. And in the emails that she's sent to my mom, the one thing that she pointed out was that happiness is the key to life, not wealth nor fortune. That resulted in her good heart.

Even Gilbert. When I went for CYF sessions with him, I always thought he was born a Catholic, and was brought up in a family that really practiced the faith. But I was wrong about that. Gil converted just a few years ago, and yet, although he's been a Catholic for a shorter time than me, he knows so much more about the faith, and he knows how to follow in the footsteps of Jesus.

Another inspiration to me is Lester. I'm pretty sure he's born a Catholic, so he's proof to me that even cradle Catholics don't have to lack that faith. He's so strong in his faith, that even though he's gone through quite a bit as a teen, and even know as an adult, he's put in such difficult situations, but he doesn't get angry with God or anything for putting him through so much. And even when I rant to him, he always tells me that God gives us what He knows we can handle.

Even Val, when she was so active in church, inspired me although I was still young. I saw how active she was, and how happy she was, that I was actually very intrested in being active in church like she was. Yes, she may be busy now a days, and not be as active, but I know that she tries.

These four inspirations have changed my life, and I've realised that it doesn't matter if I would have converted anymore, because that is something that I won't ever find the answer too, but I can change my life for the better, and lift all my worries and troubles up to God, and live life with an open-mind, and an optimism in me.

Wow...

You know, on the trip to Oregon this past weekend, I realised stuff. Like, I realised that my dad's just trying to do all he can to help me, and it's not like he's going to get anything out of it. He's just doing it all for me. I finally understand what Tim and my mom have been trying to tell me.

You know, I saw Val's entry about having the family back together, and Cel's entry about Saturday dinners, and it really struck me that my sister and cousin care about the family a lot more than I thought, especially since they aren't always there, especially Val. But I agree with both of them.

I'm really going to miss Tim once I go back. I've lived the past 5 or 6 years without him, and I was so happy to finally be with him again. Now, I don't even know when he's going back, and I don't know when I'll next see him anymore. =\ I guess Val must feel worse, because she hasn't seen him for an even longer time compared to me.

And I miss the family dinners too. It's just different without the whole family there, and it's true that it's more quiet these days, and they seem to just end earlier and earlier. It's a sad fact. Well, I just hope that we could all return home and stay together. I'll make that my birthday wish for this year. I wish that the family will return home and stay together forever. I really miss them...

Ok, I should probably hit the books. Actually, not the books. The exam papers. =(

Holiday, holiday, holiday.

I'm going off to Nelson tomorrow with Godma and family, and Chelsea! Yay! Haha. Coming back on Monday. ^^ Then Wednesday would be the first CCD class for the year. Thursday the family's off to Oregon! Going for 6 days. Haha. I'm enjoying my holiday! Haha. I've had so many holidays this year!

Apr: Seattle
May: Montreal and Toronto
Jul/Aug: Singapore
Sep: Nelson and Oregon
Oct: SOMEWHERE GREAT! ^^

And in between, I've been going down south with Godma and family, and Chelsea too! Haha. So fun! Oh well, won't be online again until Monday afternoon or evening. Maybe Tuesday if I'm too tired. ^^ But ew, there's a SEVEN TO TEN hour car ride! I'm gonna be so car sick :( Oh well, that's when my 2 MP3s and my DS and my phone comes in. HAHA.