Why?

Ok, you've used me as an excuse once, why are you doing it again? You told them that you were going out with me, but in actual fact, you weren't. You're betraying their trust in you, and you're just showing me that I'm just someone that you use, not a true friend. WE agreed to help solve our problem, but WE don't seem to be doing anything. Not even myself. Now I see why it's so hard to get over friendship problems. It's not as easy as it seems.

I always thought that it was because of the physical distance, but even now, it's still the same, maybe even worse. I was going to talk to you, but then I could never find the courage to tell you. Why? Why am I so afraid to tell you? I guess I just really don't want to take the risk of having to let go of this friendship, even if holding on means that I'll constantly be suffering. Maybe even you'll be suffering. But for some reason, both of us don't want to do anything.

God, please help us get through this tough time, and maybe give either one of us, or both of us, the courage to speak up, to help save this friendship. I really don't want to lose her as a friend, and I don't think she really want to lose me either. If not, she wouldn't even have contacted me. Amen.